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Star Wars Character Breakdowns Surface, and They’re Extremely Fit

Are you young? Are you fit? Then you might want to think about trying out for director J.J. Abrams’ Star Wars: Episode VII.

A list of character breakdowns for the J.J. Abrams-helmed continuation of the Star Wars franchise has appeared online, first reported by Bleeding Cool. Representatives from Lucasfilm confirmed their legitimacy to Entertainment Weekly. The descriptions are rather vague, but there’s a common thread through almost all of them: the Star Wars team is all about fitness.

Read on for the full list:

Late-teen female, independent, good sense of humour, fit.

Young twenty-something male, witty and smart, fit but not traditionally good looking.

A late twentysomething male, fit, handsome and confident.

Seventy-something male, with strong opinions and tough demeanour. Also doesn’ t need to be particularly fit.

A second young female, also late teens, tough, smart and fit.

Forty something male, fit, military type.

Thirtysomething male, intellectual. Apparently doesn’t need to be fit.

Is it overkill to float Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Hiddleston and/or Michael Fassbender for the thirtysomething male? If so, consider this overkill. Star Wars: Episode VII arrives in 2015.

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Comments

  • Infer6

    I Just like the description “Apparently doesn’t need to be fit”

  • Bass Guitar Hero

    “Fit”–in this instance–is just another way of saying “not fat,” IMO.

  • http://daddydoctrines.com/ Chris Routly

    Lucasfilm confirmed “*THEIR* legitimacy” or that “they’re LEGITIMATE,” unless the Lucasfilm rep confirmed that these character breakdowns are, in fact, some sort of physical manifestation of the concept of legitimacy itself. Or something.

  • Slick

    I don’t care whos in it, As long as it stays true to the Star Wars saga and Feels more like the original Trilogy than the Prequels

  • Slick

    Although, I would rather it be lesser known actors and not big shots like Tom Cruise or Robert Downey jr

  • LegacyJedi Endordude

    I’d
    like to see more differences in size down the line of Star Wars Movies,
    I mean we really didn’t get to much of that in the first six movies either.
    (Other than Dexter, Porkins, and Jabba, and Yoda, and Salacious Crumb if he even counts.) After all, Yoda
    himself said size matters not!

  • LegacyJedi Endordude

    I think they need to stay true to both the original and prequels, there are fans on both sides and if they can stay true to both of them, and give it a new feel that all generations of fans can enjoy Disney could have a bigger box office hit than they expected. (We all know no matter what it will be a box office hit!)

  • A. Holland

    You’re fit but my god don’t you just love using laser-swords in a fight!

  • relentless79

    Star Wars Kid will be highly disappointed :(

  • Talon Coughran

    God forbid we get fit people to run, jump, dodge, duck, and fight in an action packed sci-fi movie, right?

  • BarryTheMuslim

    fit? Sure I’m fit. Fuck you JJ.. how’s that for fit ya little bitch.

  • George Doukas

    This is news? Come on people!

  • area 51 comics

    Villain: Young twenty-something male, witty and smart, fit but not traditionally good looking.

    Lead A Jedi apprentice: Late-teen female, independent, good sense of humour, fit. (Think modern Disney princess)

    The Leads Love interest: A late twentysomething male, fit, handsome and confident.

    Girl Han: A second young female, also late teens, tough, smart and fit.

    The Villains Catalyst: Seventy-something male, with strong opinions and tough demeanour. Also doesn’ t need to be particularly fit.

    Villains Military leader: Forty something male, fit, military type.

    Non violent Jedi Thirtysomething male, intellectual. Apparently doesn’t need to be fit.

  • robthom

    “Are you young? Are you fit? Then you might want to think about trying out for director J.J. Abrams’ Star Wars: Episode VII.”

    Indeed.

    abrams and lindelof have a perverts obsession with every ones physical attractiveness.
    Everybody has to look hyper-sexy yet vaguely underage.

    jj trek really looks like nothing more then 90210 with lensflare and special effects IMO.

    Or transformers.

    And jj wars will be the same.

    But people seem to like it,
    so whatever.

    I know what the deal is now and I’m not getting heartbroken about it again.

  • robthom

    All the bad guys are over 25 and totally not hot.

  • robthom

    “run, jump, dodge, duck, and fight in an action packed sci-fi movie”

    Just like Star Wars when it captivated the world.

  • robthom

    He’s not the only one.

  • robthom

    Apparently there will be much more running, jumping, dodging, ducking, and fighting prequel style then Star Wars style.

    But I’ve got a hunch that will mostly be CGI just like the prequals and the fit part is mostly for abrams to paint everybody into skintight costumes and stripping them down to their space bra’s.

  • robthom

    Porkins was awesome.

    (Although the moniker was a little bit mean.)

    He even got to be a good guy before lucas also became overly obsessed with stereotypes and image in ROTJ.

  • robthom

    Are you implying that you can hold your breath for at least the next 10 years?

  • robthom

    Who’s a fan of the prequels?

    Some undiscovered tribe deep in the brazilian amazon?

  • robthom

    Ooh tom cruise as luke skywalker!

    Its not as if abrams isn’t already considering it.

  • robthom

    It depends what the definition of is, is.

  • robthom

    The have fat actors in hollywood?

    Other then someone well known as fat like John Goodman or Kirsty Alley.

    You really think that “not fat” was the definition they thought needed mentioning?

  • robthom

    Those are bad guys.

    I’m wondering where they’re gonna find someone like that in hollywood.

    Deniro is too old to pull another Jake Lamotta.

  • Russell Guldin

    Notice that all of the female characters MUST be ‘fit.’ Also younger than the men.
    Sexism is apparently just fine long ago in a galaxy far, far away.

  • Talon Coughran

    Sarlacc Pit.

  • LegacyJedi Endordude

    They are out ther my friend, some younger, some older. I would even say most people generally likes the prequels, it’s just a vocal minority that dislikes them. We all have our opinions, but someday I suggest taking a look around in your local community and start to “unlearn what you have learned,” an realise that kids nowdays (and some older folks) love the Prequels just as much as the Originals! :D

  • Bass Guitar Hero

    Yes, because in a fairly open casting call (as this appears to be),”fit” is the most straightforward way of saying they want someone who will probably be doing a lot of running, jumping, and other very physical work in this movie (especially if they have to do multiple takes).